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Thursday, March 15, 2012

It's Hard!

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Today we sit knowing nothing more than we did 1 week ago when we found out about Ivy's surprise pulmonary valve. We are 1 week in to the wait, we are 1 week in to some precious time at home with all 6 of our kids, we are both happy and sad.
It is hard to wait, that part I know for sure. It is hard to say, I fully believe in your perfect timing God, when you see things the way I do. It's hard to stop dwelling on the fact that my oldest daughter is here to help with the family until the 20th and its already the 14th and we are still waiting. It's so hard. Its hard to believe that Spring break, no school, no dance, no shuffling schedules, is happening right now as we speak and the timing in my eyes would have been oh so perfect, but it's not the right time. Most of all, it's just so hard to see Ivy's numbers dropping before my very eyes and how purple her little hands and feet are and know that God has a better day planned for this.  Yet even so, I know. I know He does. I know He's got this. It is what gets me through every day. I know He has the perfect day and the perfect plan. Yes, my heart stops every time the phone rings, yes I get up in the night several times to check on Ivy, yes I'm frustrated that my sweet baby is now getting nosebleeds from the constant oxygen. But all in all, without a doubt, I do know that this time we have had, this week at home with all 6 kids (my 21 yr old visiting for 10 days) has been a gift! It is like Christmas every day. With lots of voices and so much laughter, meals together, late night movies and kids all over the place wrapped in blankets till all hours, swimming and all of us playing games with each other on our iPhones! It makes my heart swell! Having Quincie home has been such a blessing. She is a HUGE help with the girls, and oh my goodness, Lexi still shrieks  with delight when she sees every morning that Quincie is still here!!! 


What a blessing for Ivy to be able to feel the love of the whole family, all together, enjoining every moment! Ivy LOVES when we are all together!! Yesterday we ventured off to see a movie! Yep, the kids thought I was crazy but I needed to get out!!! So the kids and I took the girls to see The Lorax. 

Guess who sat through the entire movie??? We figured Lexi would, but Ivy surprised us and sat through the whole thing. I think she ate half a Large popcorn by herself too!! She was shoving that popcorn in her mouth the entire movie. She was perfect! Lexi actually fell asleep 3/4 through the movie as it was nap time. Speaking of naps, Ivy has not really been sleeping much during the day. She is up by 8 or 9 and fights her nap now. It's odd but true. She loves the car and is always asking to go bye bye. She loves to eat and can often be found in the walk in pantry just grazing on whatever she can reach. Her favorite is veggie straws! She can't get enough of those. Not the greatest snack but sure better than the Chinese numb and spicy hot pot flavor pringles she came to us loving :)


So, due to Ivy's low oxygen saturation level, the surgeon wants to meet with us this Friday. We do know that there is still no valve for Ivy's heart. We have also been told that if Ivy's numbers are as low as they have been this week, 40's and 50's then they will need to admit her and make a new plan. A tissue valve or whatever they do outside of a homograft would just be a quick fix for now, she would need to have it replaced while she is still very young. It would allow them to fix everything else though. Tonight she was coughing a lot and breathing really hard. It started after her short nap. She was fussy and it was obvious she was feeling really yucky. She amazes me, all of us really, how she is operating like this is just amazing! 

So with all my fears and worries and heartbreak laying at the foot of the cross, I thank you once again for your fervent prayers, for sharing Ivy's story so that even more can pray and for allowing me to share our journey.

Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still. (Exodus 14:13a,14)
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27 comments:

Paige said...

Praying for sweet Ivy in China!!

Maggie said...

Mary - I know that this wait is so hard for you but I also know that God has protected Ivy so far and will continue to protect her. Love, hugs and prayers Maggie

HOPEdriven said...

Holding you all up in prayer, Mary!! What a blessing to have all your children under 1 roof - enjoying and loving each other!! Praying for sweet Ivy's miracle...
Traci

Everything Beautiful Shay said...

I am spreading the word today and will swipe photos from your blog. OK? Still praying so much for you all!!! I know God knows and pray He continues to bless baby Ivy. I can't even imagine your pain but I do know we know the Great Physician and Healer!!! Blessings and Love precious friend!!! XO

jennifer said...

I just know that God has an amazing plan for your sweet girl. Still praying for strength in her little heart and also in your "mama" heart. What a blessing to have all of your children home. I know it wasn't how you planned it, but what a great time with them.

Praying for you, my friend and for your sweet girl!

Anonymous said...

Praying, praying for your sweet, precious Ivy and the rest of your family too.

Praying also for the family who probably do now know that they are spending the final days with their child.

God's timing is perfect for both...even though we do not understand.

Amy said...

My heart and mind are still with you and your family. I'm taking a religion class currently, and when prompted this morning at the start of class for any prayer requests my hand flew in the air. I knew I had to ask for thoughts for your family. So, you had at least 20 {more} people praying for your sweet Ivy this morning. :)
{{HUGS!!}}

Mom2Six said...

Continuing to pray for your littlest one and your family.

Deanna said...

Thank you for sharing your journey. Loads of prayer going up from our family! May His glory be seen through Ivy.

Hugs,
Deanna Hubbard

Grace said...

Praying for you all. Praying for your daughters heart. The wait is hard, I know.

Tera said...

So thankful for the time you have with all of your family together! Praying for a donor to be found soon!

Jaime said...

Mary . . I want you to know that we are holding your hands in prayer during this time. I know this time is hard as a momma . . but I too have seen HIS hands work the miracles in our <3 babies lives. Sending you love, peace and comfort for your own heart . . and sending prayers of healing to Ivy.

La Dolce Vita: The Sweet Life said...

Linked over from Sharon's blog. Will join you in prayer.

Kristi said...

It sounds like your family is getting an amazing week together! Enjoy every moment.

jordon said...

thinking of you all! All our prayers for Ivy and you all!

Diane said...

Praying for your sweet Angel.
Stay strong Mary~
I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
Philippians 4:13
God Bless,
Diane

Sandra Church said...

Praying, praying, praying. Sandra, mommy to Macy from Hangzhou

Marianne said...

Praying for health for your precious little one and strength for you and your family!

Anonymous said...

Ptaying for your beautiful little blessing!
Joy

3 Peanuts said...

Found you through Diana and am praying for sweet Ivy and your family. Your faith is inspiring.

kristen said...

Praying for your precious Ivy and for peace in the waiting for you!

Angie said...

Jumped over from Sharon's blog. Will be praying for beautiful Ivy and your family here in Indiana!!!

Lee and Sarah VanGrunsven said...

Mary- I'm praising God that there is some sort of a temporary fix, at least to buy some more time!
I know He's got this.
I know how hard this is for you. I love your Faith and resolve...and your un-wiltering Faith that God will be glorified through this!
Love you sweet friend, I'm continuing to pray daily. Anything else at all that you need, even though I'm a few states away, please let me know!
Sarah

Trumbullfamily said...

Mom and I are coming soon Sis! Our little Ivy will make it through, I just know it!!! Love you all with all my heart and soul!!
Kim

Lyn said...

Praying for precious Ivy. I am also a China heart baby mom. The wait and the timing is hard. Our family has been wearing our bracelets to remember throughout the day to pray.
Love,
Lyn Thomas

Virginia said...

Praying for that sweet girl of yours. It's hard, but you're right, his timing is perfect.

Gin

Jan said...

We have a group of women in Minneapolis & St Paul who are praying for Ivy! May our Powerful, Most Loving Father give you Perfect Peace as you wait for His miracle to be accomplished! God must have something extra special planned for this little darling! Blessings to you for following His calling...

 
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