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Sunday, April 1, 2012

Hold me!

Pin It I think that my heart may have broken in 5 different places in just the past 3 hours. It is midnight now, Ivy is getting her breathing treatment. She is awake and she is thirsty! She wants her mommy to hold her, she reaches her arms out wide open and I can't hold her. It is the hardest thing you can imagine. I try to lean on her and touch her with every part of me so she feels almost like she is being held and she shakes her head no and puts those arms right out there again! I want to scoop her up so bad it hurts! And she is so thirsty. They give her a damp washcloth to put in her mouth and my sweet girl tries to suck the life out of it! She trembles, hands shaking like crazy, head trembling as she tries to shove it in her mouth and suck it! This is hard!!! Watching your child thrash around of thirst, watching her beg for the comfort of a mothers touch, being held by her mommy. Oh yes, hard!! And yet it is also another milestone reached, she is awake, she is one step closer! 
Tonight Ivy has a collapsed left lung. She has a whole lot of junk in that lung and she is getting lots of treatments to try and get it out. Cough and suction is the best and they are doing this with her right now. She is coughing, this is so so good!!! 
Ivy has a cannula for her oxygen. She is getting 10 liters per minute! That is enough to blow a 17 pound baby right out of her bed!! Remember she got 2 liters at home! But she is so far tolerating the 10 liters and it is keeping her O2 saturation in the high 80's to low 90's. 
We thank you again for your specific prayers and will update you as we see change. Thank you again for being a part of Ivy's story and Gods perfect plan! Pin It

14 comments:

Kristi said...

Your faith and optimism are inspiring. And how incredible that she is so attached already that she just wants her mama!

Sweet, sweet girl.

Luciana said...

Precious, sweet, sweet baby. Mommy, be strong. You will hold your baby soon. Ivy, I'm so happy that you know who your mommy is!

Diane said...

I KNOW how hard it is! Our oldest had heart surgery when he was little. It is just heart wrenching. Praying it won't be long until you can hold her. Praying for healing, and a miraculous, only God recovery!!!

KandK said...

Ivy's eye's are open....Ivy is speaking....

"Faith is not believing that God can, it's knowing that God will."

Seeing Ivy's amazing journey unfold each day for the past several weeks is a constant reminder that God always keeps his promises.

God Bless You Mary and Your Beautiful Ivy Joy!
Diane

Carmen said...

Praying for your strength and Ivy's fast recovery. Lean on Him.

Catherine said...

Praying for your heart as your meet every one of Ivy's needs that you're able too. I cannot imagine how hard it on both of you that you cannot physically hold her.

Thanking God for how far your amazing daughter has come and praying for continued healing including an inflated lung.

((hugs)) to all

Lori Sloan said...

I can't imagine how hard it is for you to not be able to hold your child. Praying for you and Ivy and everyone involved!

Lori

Amy said...

What a glorious milestone to reach!! I can't imagine what you're going through (I'm sending prayers for your heart as well as Ivy's!). I'm sure you have an almost physical pain to hold your baby... My heart aches for you! But it is such a beautiful thing that she wants you- her mama!! Praise & Glory!
~Amy

Darlene said...

Oh I cannot imagine the pain of not being able to hold her. I am praying for God to comfort her and quench her thirst.

Mélanie said...

It's like reading our own story... Be strong Ivy!!!

Heather N said...

Oh, my heart breaks for you. I imagine how much you want to hold her (every mama wants to comfort her child!). What a great sign at this early stage in adoption she yearns for your touch. How hard this must be for you. Praying that she continues to heal quickly so that you can pick her up and give her the biggest mama-hug. Also praying for her thirst to subside or be allowed to be quenched.

Paige said...

Bless your sweet hearts!!!! Praying for you all!!

Faith, Hope, and Love said...

Oh Mary....I can not imagine how difficult that must have been for both you and your precious girl!

Praying for God's healing up Ivy Joy and strength for her mama...

Love and blessings,
Robin

Sharon Ankerich said...

Oh how I am praying for your heart to be strong and love that baby the best way you can. I am still praying for you all!!! XOXO

 
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